Thursday, December 4, 2008

Tired of Being Ugly

Somewhere along the line I stopped caring what I looked like. Now I am a reasonably attractive individaul. I am not super model beautiful but my face doesn't stop a clock either.. I have always dealt with the weight issues, some of the issues were manufactured and unreasonable, growing up in Southern California where a 21" waist was considered fat because I had hips. But a lot of my issues are accurate.

Now self image played a huge part, I thought I was fat so I became fat. And then there is the age old excuse it is my mother's fault who cares that I have been on my own for almost 30 years and I never had a major weight issue until after I did so. I can blame part of it on a bad marriage and depression but seriously what it comes down to is I stopped caring what I looked like. This week I pretty much decided that, that attitude just completely sucks.

Steps I am going to take to make changes, well for starters I am fat does that mean I have to be dumpy? No, so starting in the morning it is up to walk, then shower make up and hair. Not a major effort but one that makes an attitude adjustment. I have an extremely slow metabolism so the best way for me to loose weight is diet and exercise and yes the diet means eating.. not abstaining. So tomorrow after I walk, it will be a small breakfast to get the metabolism going..

I want to loose 130 lbs, but for next week I will be happy if I loose 5 (ok so i want to loose 20 but how realistic is that- I am going to be ecstatic with 5). Tomorrow I am going to take the before picture, I am going to post it here.. and you all get to loose the weight with me.

I figure the accountability will help but not just that if I take the steps to make a change in my life I will just feel better about me. Then I am gonna like me more, then I am just going to be a nicer person because I am happy and then my world will most probably settle back into it's proper orbit.

In the end it is not about loosing the weight which I wan to do but rather about taking charge and making a difference first in my life then we shall see where I go from there.


  1. Wishing you the best of luck on this journey! My best tip from my healthy-weight arsenal? Almonds! Take care of your health first--without health, we have nothing.

  2. That sounds very positive! I'm sure you're gonna succeed!

    I also think it's important to take care of yourself. If I hang around in my sweatpants all day I start feeling quite depressed. So I always take care in the morning to shower and put on some nice clothes.

  3. Don't forget to exercise!

    Take good care of yourself and if five pounds don't come off in a week, don't worry. You're talking about making real lifestyle changes, and those can take awhile to make a habit.

    Good luck! It'll be fun to watch your progress.

  4. Good luck! Keep up the good attitude. I announced my disgust with myself on my blog yesterday and have started a new exercise routine. Although right now I want to make brownies...and I haven't worked out yet! YIKES!