Friday, December 5, 2008
The It's About Me'ers
Have you ever looked around you and discovered how many people there are in your life that are actually bringing you down? The ones who claim to care and yet everything you do, they do, the world does is about them?
You plan a surprise party for them they somehow make you feel guilty for doing so then years later make you feel guilty for not doing so. The ones who watch you clean an entire car, apt, whatever for someone wait till you are almost done then come along and say well you should have done it this way. The ones who say no one ever listens to me, and when you are trying to help them to pay attention they tell you to shut up it isn't about you?
It doesn't matter what you do or where you are or even what your intentions are all that matters is it is about them. I have a few of these people in my life I am not going to name names and make accusations because it's not about them. It is about how I have learned to handle them. Most of these people are individuals that I care for deeply which is why it is difficult to totally ignore them. What I have learned is that they will never see what they are doing only where you are failing. It becomes your responsibility to decide what your goals are what you want to do, even for them and to go out and do it.
As a trained and incredibly good customer service representative I have made my living over the years helping people solve their problems to their satisfaction one of the tools I have learned is the repeat.. yes I can see where that may upset you.. It is a great listening tool and better yet it is a wonderful coping mechanism. In a way it all becomes a game, can I get off the phone with this person with them happy, me happy and the problem somewhat resolved. Now if one uses this tool with evil intent it will still work but it won't bring you peace and for me that is the goal. I don't care if the people I love have to make everything around them about them what I care about is how I can run my life parallel with theirs.
I try I really do to live my life by that adage do you want to be right or do you want to be happy..but somewhere along the line I have realized darnit being right makes me happy... but seriously with some people I will never be right and with some people it will never be about me. So I choose to love the ones near to me anyway, accept them for who they are. Tolerate the ones I must and honestly walk away from the ones who are just taking up air space. Not with malice but hey this time it's about me.